People don’t have an ounce of shame these days

Readers,

Do you read advice columns?  I do.   My favorite has to be Ask Prudence on Slate.   She’s a riot.  Yesterday’s Ask Prudie column featured a lovely lady (sarcasm alert!) that wrote the following:

Married Boyfriend Makes Guilt Payments to Wife: I’ve been involved with a married man (don’t judge) who decided to move out and get a divorce. It came unexpectedly to his wife. He said that after nine years of marriage, he owes it to his wife to continue significant financial support until she completes her two-year course (which she hasn’t even started) and finds a job. As a result, nearly most of his income continue to go to his wife and children as though they were still living together. I understand his sympathy toward her but this is taking a toll on our lives, as well. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship as I now support myself and my boyfriend with my income alone. He gets touchy and defensive when I ask him to agree on a more realistic amount and time frame for alimony with his wife. Is this a sign that our relationship won’t work out in the long term?

Really?  Really?  Girl, bye!

First of all, this bitch is disrespectful.  To herself and this man’s wife.  As soon as she found out that fool was married she should have told him to kick rocks, yet she stayed.  Mistake number #1.

Then, she has the unmitigated gall to act like his wife and children should drop off the face of the earth just so he can contribute more to their household.  Mistake number #2.

Now Prudie offered her a “you made your bed, now lie in it” response which much more kinder than she actually deserved.

I would have sent her this YouTube video of Peggy Scott-Adam’s blues classic Help Yourself.  In the song, a resigned wife of a cheating bastard pointedly tells the mistress that she knows all about her, but surprise, “he (the husband) doesn’t have a dime to give you or no one else.  So if you want that broke man, help yourself!

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Damn my highfalutin tastes!

I have a problem.  I love things; not regular old things, but nice things.  And y’all know when I say “nice” there is a 85% chance that I really mean “expensive.”   Side note: In case you didn’t know, Mocha Pikachu is from the South and has a charming accent, hence the “y’all.”

I aim for quality rather than quantity, so most people think that I’m disintestered in such things as fashion.  I’d just rather have a few things that I really love and will last a long time, than 50 things that I’ll grow tired of or bought just because they were on sale.

So how is this a problem, you ask.  I seem to have worked out a good system where I buy according to my logic.  The problem comes when I want to buy a lot of nice things at once and my mind goes into the normal INTJ obsessive overdrive about the things.

This morning, I went to several home and furniture websites and pinned a bunch of stuff that I want to buy for the house to Pinterest.

I tried on 2 of the best pair of boots I’ve ever seen at Nordstrom and then saw an ad for a Louis Vuitton bag that I would actually consider carrying.  And to make matters worst, my friend Adam sends me a link to website where you can build your own custom shoes.  He’s getting pinched!!!

My brain is on overload.  So much fanciness at once.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Real Music Thursday

Hello Readers,

As you know, Mocha Pikachu is in the process of buying a house.  I’ve been quietly telling myself for over a year that it’s time to have a little something to call my own.   I’m tired of apartment living and the rent increases and the thin walls and the crazy ass neighbors.

Now that ball is rolling, I’m freaking the hell out on the inside. I’m not a fan of debt, but I’m also not a Rockefeller, so mortgage debt will be a part of my life.

I’ve had a few sleepless nights wondering if this is the right thing or is everything going to pull together in time.

So today’s song is Colin Hay’s Overkill.  The lyrics especially speak to me during this stressful time. Trying to imagine every scenario in a situation is normally what I do.  It’s just something that introverts do.  However, in this situation, my imagination is getting the best of me.  It’s overkill and I need to reel it in.

I can’t get to sleep
I think about the implications
Of diving into deep 
And possibly the complications…

Hahaha! I laughed like a damned fool

Never underestimate an owner’s love for his or her pets.

House Hunting Update: Possibly goods news.

Update!

I didn’t get that townhouse that I bid on, but more have come on the market.  I saw another nice place and put a bid on it.   The owner accepted, so wish me luck.  We’re still at that stage where anything could happen.

For the love of God and all that is holy, please wish me luck.   My ratchet ass neighbors are fighting as I type this update.  I need to move.  

In this area, reasonably priced condos and townhouses do not stay on the market.   I looked at this current place at 8pm on a weekday about a day or so after it came on the market just to get a head-start on other buyers.   Craziness.

 

 

Real Music Thursday. I’m only a day late!

Hello Readers,

The Mocha Pikachu has caught a cold in the middle of summer in the middle of a damn heat wave.  I think the today’s temperature with the heat index is 113.

Today’s Real Music Thursday has been submitted by my friend Adam.   The song is a lovely duet between the late, great Donny Hathaway and Roberta Flack called “Be Real Black for Me.”  Donny is his favorite singer.

It’s a very simple, smooth love song about lovers that just want to enjoy each other in all of their realness.  “Lips, warm and luscious….hair, soft and crinkly.”

Enjoy!

You have to have some fun at work

I heart them!

My Favorite Scene: House of Cards (BBC Version)

Hopefully, by now you’ve heard of House of Cards:  BBC or the American Netflix version.  Both are about a prominent national politician Chief Whip (BBC)  Francis Urquhart/House Majority Whip Francis Underwood (American) that helps the Prime Minister (BBC) /President (American) get elected and then finds himself passed over for a promised position.

Both are great, but for very different reasons.   I’ve seen both and and I adore Kevin Spacey as Francis Underwood (American),  but I have to give it the late Sir Ian Richardson as Francis Urquhart (BBC).   He plays Francis as a bubbling cauldron of calculated menace and rage masked by an elegant veneer.

Now on to the scene:  Mr. Urquhart is quietly waiting to see the new Prime Minister and discuss his plans/suggestions for the new administration.   Watch until about 22 minutes in.  Or do yourself a favor and watch the whole episode.  There are 4 total in the first series.

That split second hand grip that Richardson does…chilling.

If hand-grips could talk

When I first started watching House of Cards, I was about to give up on the series until this scene.  That scene made want to watch the rest because I knew some serious shit was about to go down.

Richardson’s Francis doesn’t roar.  He doesn’t bellow.  Besides that hand gesture visible only to the audience, he gives no indication that he’s not going to be a team player. He goes home, has a drink and decides to destroy this man’s political career probably in much the same way he would decide to remodel his study.   It’s logical (to him) and, well, fuck it, he has the time.

He’s cool, sinister, and menacing in the most gentlemanly possible and I can’t help but admire the bastard for it. It must be my inner supervillain.

Watch out for the quiet ones.

The worth of a Black Child in America

Zero.  Zilch.  Nil.  Nada.  Not a god damn thing.

In America, black children are not worthy to be seen as children.   Emmett Till’s life wasn’t worth a whistle and Trayvon Martin’s wasn’t worth a stroll from the snack store.

I’m not a parent.  I can only imagine how Trayvon’s parents feel.   I don’t even want to think about how black American parents are feeling right now.   As adults, they horribly understand how some people in America feel about us.  But how do you explain that to a child?

How do you explain that our people have been in America since it was a colony, but we will never be considered “real Americans.”  How do you explain that we will forever be made to be aware of our otherness?  Not because we choose to highlight it, but because some of the “real Americans” do it for us.

How do you prepare your child for that fact that being black in America means that you have little to no room for error?

How do you prepare your black child for that moment I would venture to say that every black person has had in America?    The definitive soul-crushing moment where they realized that no matter what he/she does that to some of the “real Americans” he/she is just a (negative) stereotype.   That moment where someone has decided that his/her thoughts, feelings, and actions are not worthy, real, or even worth consideration.

How can you teach a black child all of that without in damaging his/her innocence in some way?

The next time some misguided soul asks you “Why can’t you just be an ‘American’?”  Tell him/her that “My people have been trying to be for centuries.”

It’s 2013 and the trees in the South still bear a strange fruit.

An absolute travesty…house hunting

First, Happy Saturday Dear Readers.

Now on to the rant.   After much consideration, I have decided to buy a home.  So today was the first real time that I could look at homes in person with the realtor.   I picked out 4 places based on pictures from the website.   Let’s just say that picture lighting and angles are everything, because some of these places were the epitome of fuckery.   I could see even the realtor was silently screaming “what the hell?”

What is wrong with people?  If you are trying to sell your home:

  1. Clean the damn house and the yards.  Some fool left behind TV’s and trash cans.  Who does that?  Might I add that scented plug-ins are always a nice touch.
  2. For the love of God, paint!  You may love baby-shit green and 1972 El Dorado orange, but the rest of the public might not.   It was difficult for me to visualize what I could do with a room when the color kept distracting me.
  3. Be honest.  Some buyers like myself understand that some minor work may need to be done and we accept that.  I walked in one place today and knew immediately that the porch needed work.  No biggie.  However, I found several soft spots in the kitchen floor.   Red alert!  A new floor is not minor work.
  4. Be realistic.  Now this relates back to number 3.  No amount of good location can make-up for shoddy up-keeping.   Stop trying to sell a house for the market rate when you know that the amount of repairs needed are severely hurting the value of the property.  One place could have knocked $50k off the price and it still would not have been worth it.

Now despite some duds, I did see a place that I liked.  It is perfect?  Absolutely not, but it met enough of my criteria that I’m seriously thinking about making a bid.

Also, if there any homeowners that are landlords reading this rant:  Please, please check on your property regularly.  I saw a home that was trashed because the landlord felt that after a few check-ins, the tenant was trustworthy.   That tenant must have caused at least $25k worth of damage to the home.

 

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